What To Do When Your Sugar Baby Doesn't Like Your Friends?
In an ideal dating world, our partners would love all our friends. However, sugar baby dating is very different from traditional relationships. Instead of a serious, monogamous relationship that could end in marriage, you're setting up a mutually beneficial relationship with a young sugar baby who, for the most part, has made some sort of agreement with you that she won't commit to much of a relationship. So, if you're seriously considering a sugar relationship, if you want it to succeed, you need to know how to deal with your sugar baby's emotions.
Wouldn't it be great if people in our lives never clashed and all of you could have brunch on Sunday? Unfortunately, your sugar baby often doesn't like your male friends. This can be the cause of many ugly arguments, and you don't want to make things worse by saying the wrong thing! So remember, it's wrong to tell her she doesn't like them. It may not be easy for your sugar baby to admit that she doesn't like your friends! She wants to like your friends, but for some reason she doesn't -- just like she doesn't like vegetables, even though she knows it won't hurt her. Does yelling at her because she doesn't like vegetables change her taste? No, so why do we use this strategy? If anything, telling her about your friend's mistake makes her dislike them even worse (as any student of reverse psychology will tell you). Instead, respond with neutral, nonjudgmental statements/questions that will help you understand why she doesn't like them. Say something like, "oh, honey, did they say or do something special that you didn't like?"
Once you find out why she doesn't like your friends, ask her a second date. If you know from your sugar baby why she doesn't like your friend, try to fix it. There may be a real reason why they don't get along. Maybe your sugar baby is angry because your friend made a bad joke about women. Maybe your sugar baby doesn't like the way your friends treat her, but he's just uncomfortable. Here's the key: first impressions aren't always right. Chances are your sugar baby needs more time to warm up with your friends!
At the same time, remember not to rush to your friend's defense or insist that she misunderstood them. Even then, wait a few minutes before tactfully coming up with a calm solution, such as: "hey, I know you didn't like them the last time I brought them, but that night it was the first time they met you and you didn't know each other very well. So, can we have a quiet lunch with them today? They really want to be with you -- I'm sure they'll like you! "
Make it clear that this is not a long-term situation. The worst thing you can do is make it a long-term situation and keep your sugar baby in constant competition with your friends. Wake up my friends and don't do anything stupid to divide them into enemy groups -- like tell your friends your sugar baby hates them! They will (naturally) resent her, which will create a long-term antagonism for all concerned and will only get worse. The next time you go out with your friends, she'll wonder if they're encouraging you to dump her, cheat on her, etc.
Don't fall into the trap of prioritizing one (even her). Don't make your sugar baby uncomfortable by saying things like, "I'm supposed to go golfing with mark tomorrow Tuesday, but I know you don't like him, so I canceled the date. You know how much he likes golf, but you're more important. "You think she'll be pleased to hear that? Actually, you're wrong. She probably doesn't want to force you to go with her. So reassure her about her role in your life (without implying that they are competing). There's no reason anyone should be territorial about you.
Let her know that you will try to solve their problems and that both of them are equally important to you. Say something like, "I know you don't like my friends this time, but I'm sure you might like them! Even if not, they are my friends and you are my girlfriend. I have different relationships with both of you... I'm confident I can solve it."
Try to find ways for them to connect with each other. Remember, the only connection they have in common is with you, and you have to run errands between them. But you can't set up a time to hang out, sit down, and expect them to hit it off right away! It's best to think about what they might have in common. Maybe your sugar baby and your friends like to sing? Maybe your friends have bad luck with women, and your sugar baby loves matchmaking? Whatever it is, try telling your sugar baby. Let her see your friend in a new light. At the very least, they share some common interests and don't hate your friends so much.
Remember not to say, "listen, he's a great guy. You've got him all wrong." Instead, tell her she might like to join Mark's (your friend's) volunteer program for the homeless. Sometimes people need a little help in maintaining relationships -- that's where you come in. Also, remind your friends to be extra friendly. You both have to try to get to know each other, or you're not being fair to your sugar baby!
Look, maybe your sugar baby and your friends will never be good friends. But never mind! You should at least try. If you are a sugar daddy, you must understand that you are not immune to such problems. The two of you have an sugar arrangement, which is usually the extent of the relationship. As long as you know how to deal with this situation, you will have a good sugar relationship. After all, this isn't elementary school: you should be able to handle the situation with the grace of an adult. Don't be angry with her because she doesn't like your friends! Think of it this way: isn't it nice that two different types of people like you so much? This relaxed, mature attitude will relax her. Good luck!